What do You Need to Stop Saying?
Good Morning,
One of my theories about life and business is this: If the people you are working with are nice you can have fun. If they aren’t it probably doesn’t matter what you are doing. It is probably going to be painful. In the latter scenario one of the most difficult things to do is to hold your tongue when you want to speak out and tell them what is really on your mind. But hopefully you use restraint. That itself is a win.
Sometimes after a win like that we get home and let our guard down. Something happens with your spouse or your kids and the pent-up frustration comes out. You say things to them that you would never say to a customer or colleague. The people we are close to don’t always get the best of us. This is not something any of us would desire, but on occasion it happens.
But there is one other person who sometimes gets the brunt of our feelings even when we hold back with customers and family. Who am I referring to? You. When looking at that person in the mirror what things do you say that you would never say to others? Things like: “You’re an idiot.”, “What a screw up.”, “You need to scale back your dreams.”, or “Your best days are behind you.” For some reason, we too often think it is ok to treat ourselves with less regard than almost any other person in our life.
I wonder what God who crafted us with great care thinks when he hears us talk to ourselves like that? I think it probably does more than disappoint him. I bet it actually hurts him. For us to believe those negative things it takes buying into lies that we are not very capable, not very useful, and not very significant. This is completely contrary to the truth of Scripture. It sells you short and reflects poorly on your Creator at the same time. Not long ago a colleague of mine called me on this. They said in effect: “You believe others have tons of potential. You need to make sure you believe that for yourself.” Ouch. Yet all of us, if we aren’t careful can easily fall back into a trap of self-doubt and reduced confidence.
Maybe at the start of 2019, it is time to start talking differently to yourself. Maybe it is time to stop living in negativity and aim higher. Maybe it is time to start applying the same belief and hope you have for others to yourself. This is more than just positive thinking. It results in forward moving actions. It means establishing a personal growth plan with the belief that you are worth the effort. It means being alert to the lies you have bought in to and taking them captive. It means partnering with the Grand Designer of your life to discover new trails and live with new intentionality.
Ask yourself this morning, “What am I saying to myself that needs to stop?”
Live this week on purpose,
Ron Klopfenstein
